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>Take a closer look
>Make a graceful exit
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Fitting In (or Not)

By Carla Joinson
Winter 2004 Print
continued from page 1

That strategy helped former Navy Lt. Cmdr. John Kirkpatrick when he ran into what he described as a bad situation as an interim project manager. "The person who eventually took over the project was terribly abrasive," says Kirkpatrick. "At the first meeting where we interfaced, he undercut my previous decisions and impugned my reputation."

Kirkpatrick says he had a serious conversation with the newcomer after the meeting but knew it would be impossible work with this individual. "I went directly to my manager and told him that he had to put me in another position or let me go. I was fairly certain I would get the help I needed from my boss, but I was prepared to move on."

Fortunately, Kirkpatrick's manager moved him to another position - away from the other employee. "I was lucky that there were other positions available, but I had a good relationship with my boss and was also very knowledgeable in this area," says Kirkpatrick.

If you discover you're merely going through generic transitional bumps, you're likely to feel better. If you're experiencing something out of the norm, however, experts advise you to address those specific issues and take action.

"It's fairly typical to have second thoughts or adjustment difficulties with a major transition, so don't get too worried at first," says Dale Kurow, a career and executive coach based in New York. "But if you feel like you made a mistake, do some homework. Make a list of what attracted you to the job in the first place and ask why you accepted it. Do these reasons still exist? Analyze the positive aspects, if they exist. This list ends up being a test against just being impulsive," says Kurow. "If you feel the job's not working after this test, plan your exit strategy.'"

Make a graceful exit
If all the conversations in the world don't seem to be correcting your bad situation, it's time to get out. This can be a tough, but sometimes much-needed, decision. "I had never quit a job - I'd never quit anything, so it was very hard," says Maj. Mike Meehan, USAF-Ret., who left his first post-retirement job after six months because of continued conflict with his supervisor. "I took a long time to make the decision," Meehan says, "but I got to a point where I just said 'This isn't worth it.' "

There's no particular length of time one is expected to stick with a job that's not working out, though most who have been through the experience advise getting out sooner rather than later.
Goedde says, "If it's not working out, parting ways and moving on is OK. This is a change, starting with the dot.com boom when the ball was in the employee's court.

"We don't think twice if someone applies for a job and is unemployed - and it used to matter," explains Goedde. "Now we don't read anything into that. We expect that people have made mistakes."

People who have experienced mismatches caution against burning bridges in the exit process, though. "The beauty of [veterans] is that they have integrity, trust, and respect for others," says Gilbert. "Apply these core values to transitions both into and out of a firm, and leave on a positive note. It's not useful to be rude out the door."

Ziff's disillusionment with his factory representative job was due to what he felt was misrepresentation of the job from the company. Although he did the best he could and increased sales in his previously neglected territory, he began contacting recruiters when he realized the position wasn't going to work out. He had a job in hand before he quit, and others who have been in similar situations recommend that same strategy.

Move on
A sense of failure is common after leaving a job that doesn't work out, but Dooney says there's no reason to feel that way. "You can't have 20 years of success and then not be good at anything. Mistakes and mismatches happen. You shouldn't feel as though you can't do anything well in the private sector."

Enduring a poor job match can be a perfect time to explore exactly what you do and do not want in a job. "It took me a long time to make the decision to leave, because I hadn't figured out what I really wanted to do," says Norton. "I used to say that I'd made a big mistake, but not anymore. I learned a lot and I discovered what I didn't want."

Many retired or former servicemembers worry that a short tenure somewhere will look bad on their resume as they search for a new job, but that concern has much less validity than it used to. "Red flags on resumes depend on the screener or hiring manager," explains Marcia Bench, chief executive officer of Career Coach Institute in Lake Havasu City, Ariz. "Some companies consider frequent job changes favorable, and some consider them unfavorable. Search out the right company to try next."

Bench also suggests job seekers can try other equally effective employment routes that don't involve resumes, like networking. "Otherwise, you can decide not to mention the job, or speak of it as an interim position. If it's longer than 'taking a break' would explain, be prepared to address your reason for leaving."

It's important to be clear about why you left and what you need now, says Kurow. "Don't apologize or babble about being in a job for a short time. Have a two- to three-sentence explanation ready and rehearsed," he says. That quick discussion should be positive to the extent you can make it so. "Never bad-mouth your current or former employer," says Branch. "If your philosophy of management was different from that of the company, or there was a disconnect between company culture and your philosophy, that would be a positive reason for leaving. Then go ahead and explain what that philosophy is."

Transition assistance programs within the services often tell retiring servicemembers that it takes three to five jobs to settle in, says Gilbert. "That's an old statistic, but it holds true. We review lots of resumes and conduct interviews in which short job tenures appear and we understand the dynamics of that."

"There's a lot of other opportunities out there, and life's too short," Schneeweis advises. "It's common knowledge in the job hunting community that it takes a while to find the right match. Your job is a big part of who you are, and you should try to find something you enjoy."

 



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